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Broken_Elli

Broken_Elli
Name
Elli
Age
17
Gender
Female
Location
Great Britain (UK)
Joined date
April 22nd, 2008

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About

If anyone is wondering...I like colours!

For a while now...every day is being a battle. Everyday it's a battle to try and smile =(

On my poems, I'm going to start putting the intials of the people they are for...

Hey I'm Elli
Whole name is: Eleanor Mary Janaway-Murphy
I'm 17

My birthday is on Valentine's Day - February 14th
I'm single but I've got a guy in my mind who I don't want to be without, yet everyday it's like my heart breaks because he's not there =(...
I forgot to say to him, the last time I spoke to him...that...
"I'm sorry...I'm sorry I've fallen in love with you...='("

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I have this thing...I trust people way to easily. I know in the end when they walk away, I'm going to get hurt...but yet I can't stop. I keep on looking for someone who is going to stick by me through anything, and not run away from a bad joke I've told, or something I said wrong. I always get the feeling that I annoy people so much, they can't stand to talk to me. That's why I'm usually really down, from sitting infront of my computer with no one talking...no one really caring what happens to the freaky girl who needs a good friend. I hate the fact I don't fit in anywhere, I do try to, but I get scared and retreat...I stay in my shell and hope someone will come and help me through whatever I'm trying to achieve. I hate hurting people, and if I ever do, I try and make it all up by saying sorry so much, or trying to make them smile...but yet I fail at that too. I fall way to easily...but yet there's one guy that is always on my mind. I don't know if he knows who he is, but I'm just hoping one day I'll get to see him for real...even though it will probably never happen. As you can probably tell, I have a majorly negative opinion on everything, and that may well be why I lose friends so much, but it's only because when I've tried something for myself, it never comes out right so after all this time, I just give up on everything. I try to smile a proper smile at times, yet most of the times is painted on...but I am trying.
I know I'm not PERFECT and I know I've done the WRONG thing more then once...but no one is perfect in EVERYTHING and I'm TRYING my hardest!

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Besties On Mibba =)
Mitch-ii - He's not on here, but I want people to know that I love him as my bestest friend, I don't know what I'd do without him, he's been there for me when my 'bestfriend' left me alone...and I'm so glad he's there for me. Love you Mitch-ii x <3 x
Qpblazer - Luke is my ex yes...but he's been here and there for me for a while now, and I'm really glad I still have him as a friend to be able to talk to. No matter what happens, I'm always going to love you Luke, and I'm just so glad I have you as a friend still.
Cursed333 - We don't get to talk much usually, but she's awesome =) and I'm really happy for her, and hope she knows that I'm always here for her, no matter what =) No matter what hunni, always going to be here for you, just send me a message and I'll help the best I can =)
Isolate Rhapsody - Isolate is amazing =P and can always put on a smile across my face, or get me very confused with doctors and patients =P He's also awesome for helping me get ideas for my project =D
Relative Ease - Aaron is great, although we don't get on maybe as much as before, we can still have our cool chats =)
xo_3nNayhh10 - Enny is sooo awesome =) and my sister who I've never met =P heh, Love you Enny =D hehe
Yu's_Girl - Mikaela has been there for me for alot of things, and has helped me with my stories too =) thank you Mikaela for your help =) If you need anyone to talk too about anything, I'm here for you, like you've been here for me =) (hoping I spelt your name right =S) tehe
Schach-Matt - Awesome guy =D

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This thing is about me...so I'll try and find things about me

-I'm a really shy person. Face to face if I stop talking and look around it means my mind has gone blank and I haven't got a clue what to talk about.
-I don't like anything about me, and when someone compliments me, I'm never sure how to react to it
-Some of the time I can't control my anger. I sometimes just blurt out at someone and then think of what I've said and spend alot of time trying to make it up to them.
-I talk over the internet more easily, and am mostly on it
-I've just started college and am doing Level 2 Art and Design
-I draw and write stories as best I can. Even though at the end I always de-grade it and feel like what I've done is complete rubbish
-I like reading books about Vampires and creatures like that. And try to take small ideas and create something of my own.
-Yes. When I'm down way to much, I'll take it out on myself. I haven't for 3/4 weeks!! =D
-I've lost friends for being who I am, and how I act. If you don't like the way I am, I'm sorry but I'm not going to change

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♥ I read Vampire books for a reason...they always find their soulmate in a human! =( ♥
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R.I.P Great-Aunty Edna - August 20th 09
R.I.P Grandma - September 12th 08

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The stories I have on here are still works in progress
I've got a really big writers block and can't think of anything for them right now. But I promise to when everything calms down, to try right a few chapters for them again.

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I sometimes find little lines that pop into my head

♥ Love is love but what would it be if there was no one to love??
♥ Thinking is thinking, but if you think to much what would it be called??
♥ Can crying be a sin when you've done nothing wrong??
♥ When you see me cry just hold out your hand and watch me fall
♥ No one can see, how much you really mean to me
♥ Always smile never frown, that's what makes the world go round
♥ Love can be shared between two people equally, I hope
♥ All I need is a bullet to blow my troubles away, but yet I don't have a bullet
♥ I can't change life, life changes it's self
♥ You can't mend broken hearts, you need alot of sticky tape and glue
♥ Always smile, never frown. Don't let anything pull you down
♥ You can't smile when you have tears running down your cheeks
♥ When you miss someone so much you hear your own heart breaking
♥ When you feel so alone, that one person always pops up and makes a smile across your face
♥ When you wish to die you have to wish another...you have to wish someone will do it
♥ I'll cry till you hear my heart breaking...
♥ When you feel so alone, you wish That one person would pop up and make a smile across your face
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